Category Archives: essence best sellers list

I Ain’t Sayin’ She’s a Gold Digger…

I just read Shelia Goss’ post on gold digger vs. independent vs. old school vs. clingy women. Yes a mouthful…

Shelia starts her post off like this, “Does it make you a gold digger because you like nice things and want to be spoiled by your significant other?”

Answer: No, you would be a gold digger is your sole interest in being with a man is for what he could spoil you with. If you only like him for his money, his material things and the material thing you can get from him, you’re a gold digger. If you don’t really love him and will be gone once “the well runs dry”, say it with me… You’re a gold digger.

Another question Shelia poses is “As much as men confess to want an independent woman, some can’t deal with our independence. Why?”

Answer: It’s simple. Most men have been mentally groomed to be a provider to their girlfriend, wife and family. (Separately. I’m not talking about the cheating guy…) When a woman is so independent that her man really doesn’t serve a purpose, what’s the point? If you have every single thing together, where do I fit in? The ocassional sexual interlude?

Sure there are some men who want their women to be clingy. I wonder about them, too. But if you are so independent that you don’t seem to need me for anything, then where do we go from there. We have to have a symbiotic relationship where neither on of us are “clingy”. Instead, we have get past wanting each other. We have to need each other to reach a higher common goal.

Let me end by saying this:

Shelia Goss is a very, very classy woman.

Mari Walker’s Never As Good As The First Time Debuts on Essence Best Sellers List

Congratulations to Mari Walker for her novel debuting at no. 3 on the Essence Best Sellers List for August! Pretty good for her first time being published. Check it out.

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Check out my book review and my interview of the novel Never As Good As the First Timeand Mari Walker on Urban Book Source’s website. We get pretty deep.