I just read Shelia Goss’ post on gold digger vs. independent vs. old school vs. clingy women. Yes a mouthful…
Shelia starts her post off like this, “Does it make you a gold digger because you like nice things and want to be spoiled by your significant other?”
Answer: No, you would be a gold digger is your sole interest in being with a man is for what he could spoil you with. If you only like him for his money, his material things and the material thing you can get from him, you’re a gold digger. If you don’t really love him and will be gone once “the well runs dry”, say it with me… You’re a gold digger.
Another question Shelia poses is “As much as men confess to want an independent woman, some can’t deal with our independence. Why?”
Answer: It’s simple. Most men have been mentally groomed to be a provider to their girlfriend, wife and family. (Separately. I’m not talking about the cheating guy…) When a woman is so independent that her man really doesn’t serve a purpose, what’s the point? If you have every single thing together, where do I fit in? The ocassional sexual interlude?
Sure there are some men who want their women to be clingy. I wonder about them, too. But if you are so independent that you don’t seem to need me for anything, then where do we go from there. We have to have a symbiotic relationship where neither on of us are “clingy”. Instead, we have get past wanting each other. We have to need each other to reach a higher common goal.
Let me end by saying this:
Shelia Goss is a very, very classy woman.