Category Archives: love

The 14 Days After Q&A: Do you have to be a freak to enjoy great sex?


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For women, there is a stigma attached to being labeled as a “freak” that keeps some women from fully exploring their sexuality. Do you have to be a “freak” to enjoy great sex?

Tanya White: No, you do not have to be a freak to enjoy sex. Society has ingrained in our minds that sex is cheap, dirty and perverted. In actuality, sex is a sacred encounter between two mature adults who have agreed to become physically intimate because the have become emotionally intimate. When sex occurs in this context, nothing is undefiled or off limits because the two have communicated their desires amongst themselves and nobody else.

Dedan Tolbert: I believe that the negativity that many believe is associated with being a freak is intended for those women who portray themselves as a “hoe”. There is nothing wrong with being a freak under the right circumstances. My definition of a freak is a woman who will do any and everything to make sure her man is completely satisfied. Most men desire “a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets”. A hoe is someone who is promiscuous and does freaky things for a large number of people. I don’t think you have to necessarily be a freak to enjoy great sex because you’re not going to do any and everything for everybody. Some things should be saved for your man, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have great sex without doing all the “freaky” things.

Cassandra Washington: Of course not. You only have to be comfortable with your situation and your body. If you’re with a man who makes you feel safe enough to be who you are, and you accept who you are and what you can do, you’ll be quite surprised the tricks you come up with and the fun you have doing them. Having fun and trying new things doesn’t make you a freak. It just shows that you are uninhibited and open-minded, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Big Boom: To stop the stigma, women need to slow down. If you just have to have sex, then hold back some of your wild side because it could end up a one night stand. As the relationship progresses slowly begin show the side that you held back.While you two are watching something with love making in it, suggest that you and your man try it. This will make him feel he taught you something new, and you can get your freak on at the same time.

The 14 Days After Q&A is a relationship mini-series. For the month of February, each day after Valentine’s Day will feature a new relationship question to be answered by two female and two male authors who have written books about relationships. Click here for more information about the authors Tanya White, Cassandra Washington, Dedan Tolbert and Big Boom.

Sun 02-15-09 Do you have to be a freak to enjoy great sex?

Mon 02-16-09 Is sex overrated?

Tue 02-17-09 When should men draw the line in role playing?

Wed 02-18-09 Why do men really cheat?

Thu 02-19-09 Why do I date the same people over and over?

Fri 02-20-09 Why are men challenged by their perineal G-spot?

Sat 02-21-09 Do I tell my friend she’s dating a married man?

Sun 02-22-09 How do I tell my husband I’m sexually frustrated without hurting his feelings?

Mon 02-23-09 Would more racial boundaries break if more people dated interacially?

Tue 02-24-09 How do I cope with not trusting my girfriend after catching her with another woman?

Wed 02-25-09 How do I get my boyfriend of 8 yrs to understand my desire to marry him with losing him?

Thu 02-26-09 How do I cope with my boyfriend sending me mixed messages?

Fri 02-27-09 I fell in love with my best friend’s wife. What should I do?

Sat 02-28-09 Each author gets a special question just for him or her.

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5 Minutes, 5 Questions With… Kendra Wisdom Durand, author of Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms

JoeyPinkney.com Exclusive Interview
5 Minutes, 5 Questions With…
Kendra Wisdom Durand, author of Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms
(AuthorHouse)


kendra wisdom durand turiya on amazondotcom

A book chock full of an eclectic collection of politically progressive poetry and short stories swathed in cultural awareness with original photography woven throughout.

Joey Pinkney: Where did you get the idea and inspiration to write Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms?

Kendra Wisdom Durand: The structure of the book was loosely inspired by Jean Toomer’s Cane. The ingredients combined to compose most of my short stories was taken from my study of folklore, psychology, and the way in which traditional black communities tolerate change. However, my poetry covers everything under the sun. I use people, places and things that I am familiar with to create fictional tales of life experiences.

JP: What sets Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms apart from books?

KWD: I have been told that the structure of this book is unique. Combining poetry and short stories in one book is risky for a first time self published author, but one that I undertook with joy.

JP: As an author, what are the keys to your success that lead to Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms getting out to the public?

KWD: Authorhouse offered assistance in getting the book in the hands of online distributors, however getting the book on the shelves of bookstores was left solely up to me. As a first time self-published author, I am still learning the trade of marketing my book. I am looking to hire an agent for future projects. Until then, I will continue to sell my book on 125th Street in Harlem, at Venice Beach in LA, attend book fairs across the country, get my book on the tables of street vendors who sell books all over the city and use the internet to boost sells. Cultural events like Kwanzaa can also be used as a resource.

JP: As an author, what is your writing process? How long did it take for you to start and finish Turiya: A Collection of Wordizms?

KWD: My writing process consists of filling up the page with stream of conscious thoughts then going back to revise. I use my Blackberry to type in poems that come to me as I ride the subway or walk down the street. I began this book project on April 1st and it was completed by June 13th.

JP: What’s next for Kendra Wisdom Durand?

KWD: My work has been selected to appear in the anthology “Voices, a collection of poetic works” by White Oaks Publishing. I have a second book of poetry waiting to be published. I have ½ a book written called Still Standing based on a fictional New Orleans family trapped in the attic during Hurricane Katrina. I am determined to one day be listed in Oprah Winfrey’s book club. Until that day comes I will keep pushing forward to get my voice in print.

www.turiyacollection.com
www.myspace.com/kendrawisdomdurand
turiyaink@gmail.com

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5 Minutes, 5 Questions With… Michelle Larks, Author of The Legacies

JoeyPinkney.com Exclusive Interview
5 Minutes, 5 Questions With…
Michelle Larks, author of The Legacies
(Urban Books/Kensington)


michelle larks the legacies on amazondotcom

The Legacies is a tale of two young people from very diverse backgrounds who meet and fall in love while attending college. Noah Stephens is a minister’s son, and Morgan is the daughter of a drug distributor. The two encounter many bumps in the road as deathbed promises, secrets, and betrayal tear at the very foundation of their relationship. God has love for all of his children regardless of our stations in life. He sends angels to Noah and Morgan that help direct them to the path to righteousness.

Joey Pinkney: Where did you get the idea and inspiration to write The Legacies?

Michelle Larks: Actually, the idea to write The Legacies just popped into my head. I wanted to write a novel that would appeal to a younger audience. My novel Keeping Misery Company was aimed at an older market, thus The Legacies was born.

JP: What sets The Legacies apart from other novels in Christian Fiction?

ML: The Legacies is different from other Christian fiction novels because it delves into controversial subject matter: a relationship between a minister’s and drug dealer’s children. Can they co-exist and fall in love? Can the relationship remain strong despite a lot of adversity?

JP: The Legacies is similar to Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. What has been your reader’s response to you mixing a family steeped in drugs with a family steeped in religion?

ML: My reader’s response has been good for the most part. One of the points I was trying to make in the book is that we are all God’s children regardless to how we began life.  I also wanted to exemplify how life doesn’t also goes as our parents plan.

JP: As an author, what is your writing process? How long did it take for you to start and finish The Legacies?

ML: My writing process is just let the thoughts  flow, literally. I am an early bird, so I tend to write early in the morning on my trusty laptop computer. I will start with an idea, and ways to enhance the storyline just pop into my head. It took me three months to write The Legacies.

JP: What’s next for Michelle Larks?

ML: As you can tell from The Legacies, I don’t shy from controversial topics. My next book, Til Debt Do Us Part, is the story of the lead soprano of a church who battles a gambling addiction and how that hobby nearly ruins her life.

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